The backyard where my childhood soliloquies were permitted to play was a manicured grass and garden and the neighboring farm field. At its center, the grass harbors an aluminum flagpole supporting an American flag that remains lit through the night. It is sheltered by a red single-story barn, pump house, and cottage that opens to an eastern view. The foundation corner-stoned with river rock embraces raised garden beds of strawberries and sunflowers, cap-stoned by the acres of the “Iron Horse” supporting the green ocean waves that rise, fall and peak with Mount Hood.
I sit in the grass next to the flagpole and my mind opens to songs being sung. Soft wind nourishes everything it touches; crisp air whistles in my ears. The gentle unraveling of the flag, high on its mast allows the breeze to influence its dance. Heavy and somber, the flag slowly reveales the colors as if she too feels the weight of sacrifice. Pronouncing the silent dance, she taps against her mast, an unmistakable ding. Birds in conversation chirp their love, joy, and quarrels lost in a world all their own. Wings flap in pursuit of play. Donkeys stamp the dirt with their front hooves checking the safety of each step. Their lips slap together forming a pressured heavy sign that expresses an arduous life. The grass whooshes and as it is crunched and separated by the dogs laying near me — anticipating the release that is to come. I roll on my back in the cool grass, the whole of these expressions become the same song.
Each moment different than the last, but unbeknownst to me, for each moment was let go as it passed. My breath slow and eyes open to depths of blue above.
Perspective.
Worldly life fades from awareness and there is just this. Opening to experience without limitations, the dogs are first to communion as I touch their souls, akin to the breeze upon the flag. The breath stills. Lungs no longer coerce the air; the air simply flows through them.
Perspective.
Seeing ceases being action of the eyes. The eyes merely a lens seen through and seeing blooming luminous from within. Walls remaining become few. I lay the heart of my soul, in offering, upon the center of the earth, just as I lay back in the grass, and the earth cradles it. Hands reach for space to rest them upon the soul of the universe. Souls upon souls meet in recognition and embrace.
The whole of time existing in one moment. The full measure of space within reach. Looking upon the universe, universe loos upon awareness. Complete.
Then, I let it all go.
Release. | MA