My letter will be written as a journey starting when I finally realized I exist. I was born in Dallas, Texas and mostly raised in Ft. Worth, Texas. My father always worked. He moved us from Dallas to prevent us from falling into gangs. My dad got a job at General Motors, later my brothers would go on to work at GM. Everyone but me.
All I can remember from ages five to eleven was that I never knew we were poor. We always had Christmas presents and did every holiday. Later my father expressed to that me before he got the job at General Motors, he was embarrassed to get food stamps to feed six kids. I never had food stamps from ages twelve to eighteen.
My father and friends noticed my athletic abilities; so my future would be football and track, with hopes of being a Dallas Cowboy. In fact! I remember Dallas Cowboy running back, Earl Campbell and linebacker Hollywood Henderson would frequently show up at my father’s house for some of his favorite barbeque.
Yes! Sports and barbeque were religion in my life. But my mother and her side are holy rollers, so Monday through Sunday church, except football for me. My dad’s side was sports, hard successful work, and criminals, drug lords, etc. So, I had a rage temper like my father … mostly my school life was fights.
Win or lose, I had a scholarship to North Texas State, no other universities such a Florida, UTA (University of Texas Austin). Go “Long Horns.” But a dislocated collarbone ended my career, I was never the same.
Later, I listened to my dumb friend David M — he joined the Navy. See the World! And so I joined.
Some of my regrets for the younger me:
I had a change to invest in McDonald.
Should of finish college, then went into the Navy as an officer (fighter pilot.)
Should of never have married first wife, took the military shored duty orders to Hawaii for 3 years. Later found she cheated and was a mama’s girl, and mama didn’t like me.
Should of never smoke, drink, experienced drugs, over partying but should of focused more on my military career.
Would not become a propulsion plant engineer but should stayed in Austria more, and taken the radio-man career.
Should have never married my second wife, when I knew she was money-hungry, power-tripping individual. So second time shame on me.
Should have retired the military, should have retired at the VA-hospital in Seattle, WA over 21 years. But never should have went home. Miss my mom and dad.
In conclusion: I sit a lot times in here and remember, the good times. As a kid, the great friends through high schools, now some died. I remember the comrades I encountered, some go out, lived in Panama, San Francisco, Phillipines, and Austria. I remember having thegreatest times and did things, been places, I could never dreams of being. I can say that my youth I lived to the fullest. These things I do not regret. | JJ